Adventure 11-13, II Samuel: The cost of 'Love'

There is a lot about love in II Samuel. Love for kings, love for God, for friend, brother, women, sons, power, oneself. Love is certainly a good thing - after all, God created it, but as with many of life's good things, it can be expressed wrongly and have far-reaching consequences.

Almost as soon as we enter the book, we see David weeping. Weeping for the fall of Saul and Jonathan - certainly Jonathan he loved deeply. Concerning Saul it is hard to tell, but he seemed to love him somewhat for Jonathan's sake, and because he was anointed king by God. His love then extends to Mephibosheth, whom he welcomes to eat with him, instead of executing the whole of the previous king's family as was common custom in surrounding nations.

It is not only David in the book though - another major character here is Joab. Barely mentioned in I Samuel, Joab ends up being the commander of the army, and evidently a close friend of David's. He is a good general, but his love for Abishai his brother caused him to hate Abner of the opposing army so much that he murdered him when David had sent Abner away in peace. His loyalty/love for David is enough for him to carry out orders to also murder Uriah - who must have also been a close associate and probably also a friend, as part of David's 'mighty men'. Unfortunate that he was not willing to disobey the king and do the right thing - as he was willing to later, when it came to killing Absalom in battle. His selfish love for himself comes out when he also murders Amasa - who was being promoted to replace Joab as commander. Yet he shows a strong care for David, giving good advice concerning Absalom, and preventing him from going out to battle when old age starts to slow him down. He also gave good advice concerning the census - indicating he knew God would not want that.

Concerning David and Bathsheba, we see a dark, bitter side to love. Not so much love/lust for a women - although that is the beginning, but love for image - for pride and self-righteousness. The writer seems to indicate that David would generally be expected with the army, but was not - not a major thing in our eyes, perhaps moreso back then, but an indicating of complacency, perhaps a love of comfort. Then the lust for Bathsheba starts - not only looking in desire when he already has (multiple) wives (and concubines), but also continuing on when God puts warning bells in his way. His servants tell him she is married. She is Uriah's wife, a man he knows well, quite possibly a friend. But his love for himself overcomes this - I won't call it love for her, because someone with love for her would treat her respectfully. Then in his pride, trying to prevent others finding out, he tries to deceive Uriah then gets him killed - murdered.
Later, it is a similar sin of pride that causes him to number the people - wanting to quantify how great he has made the nation. In both cases he ignores God, and the warnings that come from those around him.
Critically though, and in contrast to Saul, David still loves the Lord. Psalm 51 is a poignant reflection of a penitent heart, written after Nathan confronts him and he confesses his sin without excuses.

To the choirmaster. A Psalm of David, when Nathan the prophet went to him, after he had gone in to Bathsheba.
"Have mercy on me, O God, according to your steadfast love; according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions. Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin! For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me. Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight, so that you may be justified in your words and blameless in your judgment. "

(Psa 51:1-4)

Similarly after the census he confesses his sin, repenting, and offering sacrifice of both a burnt offering and a "broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart"(Psa 51:17).

There are consequences to his sin though. His first son with Bathsheba dies, despite his fasting and prayer to God. I should note here that beautiful confidence he has in seeing his son again, though - 

David said, "While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept, for I said, 'Who knows whether the LORD will be gracious to me, that the child may live?' But now he is dead. Why should I fast? Can I bring him back again? I shall go to him, but he will not return to me." 

(2Sa 12:22-23)

In addition, we have the bitter intra-family rivalries. Possibly compounded by the multiple wives, definitely influenced by knowing their father's own immoral behaviour with Bathsheba, there is a lack of morals seen clearly with Amnon. Again, unfortunately, David's love is expressed incorrectly, possibly also influenced but an unwillingness to punish his son for similar crime that he himself committed. Whatever the reason, Amnon is completely unpunished for the brutal rape and his subsequent shaming of Tamar, letting Absalom's love for his sister fester into revenge against his brother. Rape was punishable by death in Israel, so in a way Absalom had the right punishment in mind, but it was not his place to execute Amnon. The punishment was the responsibility of either the judges or David, who should have acted for God in this case. Taking things into our own hands without consulting God and respecting the authorities only makes matters worse.

Love was seen in positive light in some parts - the strong emotional bond amongst some, the compassion, and the care for each other. Some love led to great cost because it was unbalanced or misplaced, it brought about death, broke families, and brought suffering.

It is a hard read, this book, and very sobering. Ultimately, the theme I come away with is first of all, the massive consequences of not walking in obedience to God, and secondly, that when we do stuff up and fail in disobedience, we cannot fall further than He can pick us up. We all fall. We all make massive mistakes, and we all have our human nature present that likes us to compound sin with sin so others around don't notice - but God is more powerful, He has released us from the power of our human nature (though not yet the presence of sin), and all he asks is that we confess our sin, repent of it, and rely on Him to turn from it. The greatest Love had the greatest cost of all when it led God Himself to die to pay for our failings.

O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare your praise. (Psa 51:15)